Life Drops
by Dpreukssiya
Summary: America has battled with split personality disorder his whole life, Ensnaring England along the way in a downward spiral. The pair explosively explores themselves in ways previously unknown. Sanity isn't always the threads and fabrics of life. Becoming increasingly dependent on each other both countries find themselves bound together, desperate to find the spheres of stability.
1. Toys and Anthems

**A/N: SO, sorry about my mistakes with the anthem the first time around I posted this ^^ I'm really sorry about that lol I fixed all of it so thank you guys very much for pointing out my mistakes. If I make any more please do let me know I'm open to critiques ^^ hey guys I am back sorry I took so long and not only that but I'm not even writing what I really should be writing T^T but you guys will forgive me just this once right? I hope you like this it's going to be a drabble series so don't be so harsh on me I think it will be better this way. This is a revolutionary war fic.**

**Summary: **His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly: "America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the fourth of July.

**WARNINGS: I don't own characters, rated m, masturbation, yaoi.**

**oOo Life Drops oOo**

His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly

"America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the Fourth of July. That damned brats birthday, that self absorbed annoying wanker, his thoughts trailed off topic as his hand gave a sharp thrust the toy pushing its way in and out of England's unprepared entrance. Panting audibly his back arched off his silk sheets, hair clung to his damp forehead as he moaned his throat raw. The firework finale was going off in the background, echoing through england's kitchen and reverberating up the stairs and into his bedroom.

This was all France's fault England decided, if that frog face had never given it to him he wouldn't be in this bloody mess now. The gag gift he received from the blond on his birthday was shut away immediately, swallowed by the darkness under England's bed, until he needed the American boy, which just so happened to be today, England's one day of every year he broke down. Drank more than usual, lazed around more than usual, ignoring a certain blue eyed blond more than usual. Not that any one seemed to notice. They all had their own problems to take care of. His pain was more than any one figured it would be, or possibly even realized it was. His heart ached around Alfred, America, the free country that no longer depended on him.

His last thought did it for him he couldn't hold it in any more, so he sobbed at his thoughts and own pitiful actions as that sinful-not-America-toy penetrated his prostate, bringing the sobbing nation closer, closer to his release. It felt good no he wouldn't deny that, but what hurt the most was that it just wasn't America. And England himself even realized, it never would be.

God saves the queen, no scratch that, an American anthem began blasting its way across the ocean, and to England muddled mind it sounded like god saves the queen. So humming he started doing as perspiration beads rolled down his skin and onto the sheets dampening them. Just as limbo was in reach England's humming ceased and was replaced with his own ear deafening moan, ejaculate ran down England's milky thighs as he sobbed and curled into a ball on his bed. Member quivering as it released, and England felt the pleasure, but soon it was drowned with his own heart ache. And with that self administered orgasm all that came with it was the pain and the loneliness. His ears now aware of the tune his incorrect humming belonged to

**My country tis of thee,  
>Sweet land of liberty,<br>Of thee I sing.  
>Land where my fathers died!<br>Land of the Pilgrim's pride!  
>From every mountain side,<br>Let freedom ring!**

My native country, thee,  
>Land of the noble free,<br>Thy name I love.  
>I love thy rocks and rills,<br>Thy woods and templed hills;  
>My heart with rapture fills<br>Like that above.

**Let music swell the breeze,  
>And ring from all the trees<br>Sweet freedom's song.  
>Let mortal tongues awake;<br>Let all that breathe partake;  
>Let rocks their silence break,<br>The sound prolong.**

Our father's God to, Thee,  
>Author of liberty,<br>To Thee we sing.  
>Long may our land be bright<br>With freedom's holy light;  
>Protect us by Thy might,<br>Great God, our King!

It echoed and bounced around his head, as he fully absorbed the lyrics, his tears ceased for the moment being. _That bloody Wanker! _England hissed to himself. _How dare that bloody fool steal the tune for God Save the Queen. _Pondering to himself England decided that he was to pissed off to let this slide. Never before had he listened so closely to the tune of the American's anthem. England flushed as he looked down at himself, he would shower and then he would immediately confront America about the anthem. He didn't care what day it was any more. If he couldn't have his Alfred back then he was going to end it. Sever all ties off with the blond, by hurting him. He would make sure to end it, so that there was no more pain. Wiping his eyes England stood up, scowling at his soiled sheets and made his way over into the bathroom to wash himself.

**A/N: yeah guys these chapters are going to be about this long. That why whenever I am bored I can make drabbles and keep this updated. So tell me what you all think and if I should continue this or not. Reviews are appreciated ^^ Sorry again lol for any mistakes ^^**

**P.s: yes this is not going to be a pretty fic ^^ it will be filled with angst 8D 'Cause I'm awesome. -Prussia moment- O_O**


	2. Blinding Hatred

**A/n: Well after forever i finally got a muse enough for this to continue it sorry about all of that XD anyway thank ou guys for all the favorites and stuff and remember these chapters are all drables that is all they are so i don't have to strain myself to write a crap load XD anyway enjoy**

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><p><strong>Summary: <strong>His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly: "America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the fourth of July.

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><p><strong>Warnings: I do not own any of the characters or themes! Human names are used btw<strong>

**Beginning song: Lacrymosa by Evanescence**

**Ending song: Fairy tail by Alexander Ryback**

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><p><strong>oOo Life Drops oOo<strong>

As soon as England's foot hit american soil, he crunched his boot into the ground as if he was squishing a bug beneath his boots, squashing it into the dirt, tainting the soil. The fact that he had landed on american soil, proved to be obnoxious as the constant pounding of the american anthem grew louder. America's house wasn't far from where England's private jet landed, seeing as how a landing pad was there for easier access to all of the country embodiments. The casual moonlight danced upon England's skin, caressing the fragile curves on England's lithe yet powerful figure. The loud pounding of the anthem was truly going to drive him into the brink of insanity. Breaking into a casual jog england approached the rather well guarded and well kept landscaping of his former child's large estate. Passing by many cars with balloons tied to the antennae wires. A huge and rather obnoxious on the eye banner splayed itself over the welcoming arch that lead to the front door. Obnoxious neon worded letters popping at out anyone who walked up to the entrance. And for a moment england hesitated at the door, butterflies of anticipation circling his belly, he cursed his body, it was burning with the need to see the american, and his bright blue star eyes.

Hesitantly england pressed his knuckles to the wood door and knocked slightly before ringing the doorbell. And to his surprise france answered the door, a smirk spreading from ear to ear as he eyed the britain. Twirling a cup of dark wine in his cup.

"Mon chere, i did not expect you of all people to come to America's birthday party, though i cant see how any country could ignore the blasting music, even from europe the music is so loud..." Frances grin widened as he saw the Brit's eyes darken. "The one you came for is waiting for you" France flashed one last smile at the pissed britain before moving to the side.

"What do you mean he is waiting for me?" England ground out, his heart pounding painfully so in his chest, contrary to what his expression was showing. His heart wanted to sink into the warmth of America's arms and forget the world around them, His mind however wanted to forget the painful decades and years of pain he suffered, wanted to make his former american colony weep. Pain never seemed to faze the boy, recovering fully from the revolution as if it had never happened. But then again that was the americans speciality. Running from those he care for most. Power was what the boy sought out, seemingly without a care if pain was caused in the chaotic fray.

"America expects your presence every year Angerette, Yet each year you fail to make a presence. He never asks for gifts, though the countries always bring them anyway, He always wishes for you to come. Doubt in the young man's eyes every year that you fail to acknowledge his independence..." France swirled the glass of wine in his cup again, smirking brightly, oh how fun it was to create drama between the two.

Without warning england grabbed france by the collar roughly slamming him into the door. "Either you are purposely pissing me off right now, or you do not know how to control that mouth of yours, either way you have pissed me off" England growled out not at all in the mood for the french mans games, Who's arms shot up in a surrendering pose.

"Forgive me i meant no harm." France saved his glass of wine from falling over from the force of England's push. Smaller countries stopped to watch the sudden violent out burst, pausing their dancing and chatting to stare at england. Shocked faces of the familiar european countries glanced his way, knowing full well that arthur made sure to stay clear from america during the week long birthday of his former colony. But what the hell england mused, it was the alcohol fueling him, not that he wouldn't have done this to france on a normal day anyway.

"Where is america!" England practically shouted at france, his anger swallowing the small speck of nervousness he felt. The music stopped and the Dj's voice echoed through the house announcing a song change. During the soundless few seconds loud footsteps caught England's attention as he turned to look at the source of the noise. And there he stood in his full glory, blond hair and big bright blue eyes that still held innocence, but also held something darker. His gaze wandering around his guests, until it locked on england. His eyes darkened for a split second at the sight of france and his current position with england, then his eyes brightened.

"England! I hadn't expected to see you here its a surprise! Not only that but you and france are already at it?" He chuckled lightly and slightly awkwardly as england returned America's luring gaze with a harsh glare.

"You bloody git-" England's threat stopped short by a pair of wine stained lips, arms of the french man snuck around the brits waist pulling him as close as possible, all the while France's eyes gauged the americans response who stood dumbfounded. Starring wide eyed, his eyes holding an emotion that the frenchman could only interoperate as jealousy. England's eyes widened his body to stunned and shocked to do anything but surrender to the Frenchman's less than pleasant kiss. Every one in the room stopped again starring at the commotion. England's cheeks pulsated with shame as he roughly shoved francis of of himself, his lips quivered with another insult, his face morphed into confusion and disgust all at once. He defiantly had not seen that one coming. A soft voice piqued up, a voice that no one cared for.

"F-francis..." The small shaking blond brought his quivering hand to the glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, small tears fell down his cheeks, as his small dainty hands clutched the white plush bear to his chest lightly, and before any one could fully process what had happened, the blond sobbed loudly and leapt out the front door pushing himself as far away from the house as possible, only to leave a stunned frenchman confused, and gapping at the place that Matthew had once been.

America wanted to snap and yell at francis for being so ignorant and hurting his brother, but another part of him wanted to crunch the French's skull in. He had kissed england in front of everyone. England unable to stop himself glanced up at america slightly, the boy's expression murderous.

"All of you," America started, "forgive me for his rudeness, i will be absent from the party for a little while so please enjoy yourself's. Have a good time and i will be back shortly to open presents!" He forced out through clenched teeth forcing a fake smile and happy tone. "come with me..." He whispered to england darkly and roughly grabbed the Britain's upper arm.

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><p><strong>AN: This was a bit longer than a drabble lol but so many things have happened in this chapter~ he next chapter i warn you all is going to be dark and a bit depressing so its not going to be a light hearted story. And yes i am adding some side couples~ the bunny love couple as well as franada. AND remember this is a drabble series!**


	3. The pain that mares your skin

**A/n: Yup I'm going to be writing on this story two days in a row to make up for the time that i hadn't updated this. sorry about that XD This chapter is a bit depressing... but it gets better for awhile and then takes a sharp turn for the worst ^^;; But never mind that yes? i will talk more about this when the time comes, thank you all for your reviews and your lovely favorites and alerts they fuel me o write more. ALSO lol when i give you guys songs, for the full effect of the story i would like you to listen to them while reading this thank you!**

**Summary: **His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly: "America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the fourth of July.

**Warnings: I do not own any of the characters in this story or the songs.**

**Beginning song: Change (in the house of flies) by Deftones**

**Ending song: Hunter by Bjork**

**oOo Life Drops oOo**

England tried to keep his feet working correctly as america pulled him rather roughly up the stairs, dragging him and pulling the brit rather than waiting for him. England's green eyes darted across the stair walls pictures of america and his brother lined the walls along with several old pictures of england himself and america. Their smiles in one picture eternal.

"America! Stop it I can walk on my own you git!" England growled out wrenching his arm from the americans death grip. "Your hurting my arm..." He spoke a little lighter that time hesitance present in his words, He was growing soft again with the american and he did not want that. His soft behavior was stating to piss himself off, he didn't want to be kind with alfred that was not the objective of his visit, even if that vile frog had kissed him, nothing was going to distract him form his objective. Alfred stopped himself and his rather noisy footsteps, turning to look at england, his eyes wide and young as if he hadn't even realized he was handling the britain roughly. His mouth opened as if he was going to speak but conflict visible in his eyes alfred closed his mouth deciding against saying whatever he was going to say.

"And anyway" Arthur began nervously "This wasn't why i came here at all your stupid anthem was to loud and I was having trouble trying to sleep, plus the alcohol wasn't helping at all and it made my headache worse. Those damn fireworks you where setting off weren't helping they where to bright... Not only that but I realized the tune you used, you stole the british anthems tune and-" Before England could finish his deriding speech about the American's birthday celebration, America's eyes darkened hardening like ice as they stared at his former mother continent, cutting Arthur's ramble short. Shivers ran down his spine at the intensity of Alfred's gaze it held a sudden darkness that england never before had seen. The boys natural happy atmosphere was the exact opposite of what england was seeing now.

"Why do you always have to do this? I don't understand you at all england. I don't know what you want from me anymore, You complain about everything i do. Have you not yet forgotten what happened so many years ago? Do you have to dwell on every single thing that i do? why is it never enough...?" America grabbed england by the arm again and roughly led him into what england could only assume was his room. England swallowed a small whimper, Alfred's grip was bruising and not only that but his words cut england deep, It was true, he always trued to find something to complain about. England knew that this was true. He always tried not to be this way with america but for some reason he was never able to stop his attitude. England wanted to snap back at Alfred but something stopped him.

Roughly the american shut his door closed behind england never bothering to stop and turn the lights on.

"Why must you play with me so?" England winced at the words, his night vision wasn't the best in the world, his eyes where having trouble adjusting to the darkness of the room that enveloped both himself and america. Why was alfred acting so differently from before he pondered quietly.

"Bloody hell america what is wrong with you? I insult you on a day to day basis and just because i point out a few faults you freak out on me? Damn wanker! Turn the damn lights on i cant see a thing!" A nervous laugh, "I happen to be a very forgiving man.." Breathing hitched in his throat, his words becoming increasingly difficult as his air way constricted painfully, many emotions welled up inside of england he felt as if he where going to burst. " I can't just forget everything that people have done to me... especially those i care for deeply.."

"Damnitt england you don't get it do you? And still till this day you don't understand a single damn thing i am saying to you do you?" That was all the warning america gave england before he crushed their lips together. Americas lips skillfully gliding with England's coaxing him to respond. Small tears dripped down England's shocked face, down his twice kissed lips that night as he stared into the closed blue eyes he thought he had come to know so well.

**A/N: :'( XD that was just a little hint of the sadness i intend fully to make the next chapter more depressing, also next chapter ill be a bit longer than a drabble because i am including a flash back, as well as a starter chapter for our new Franada Plot bunny :') look for this soon! ^-^% peace out ya'll ^-^**


	4. The depths of your frustrations

**A/N: Hey everyone! holly crap thank you all for your lovely comments and all of your favorites and alerts! i was so shocked by how many i received! thank you al for your support! it really means something to me! Its nice to see all of them! XD please review~**

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><p><strong>Summary: <strong>His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly: "America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the fourth of July.

**Warnings: I do not own hetalia or its characters and if i did there would be soooo much more yaoi in the series XD**

**Beginning song: E.T by Katy perry **

**Ending song: Waking up by 10years**

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><p><strong>oOo Life Drops oOo<strong>

Rivulets of clear water cascaded down upon the soggy road, dark ominous storm clouds hovered dangerously above the streets of Washington D.C. Home of the embodiment of america, Alfred F. Jones. Lightning crackled and skittered across the sky as thunder bellowed in the near distance. The storm was causing complications for a certain blond as his legs throttled him forward and further into the storm, his heart twisted up in angst and anxiety, Why was it that no one liked him? Lifting his soggy sleeve to wipe his tears canada took his glasses off and thrust them deep into the empty space of his pockets, He didn't want to look back. He didn't want francis to come after him. He didn't want to give france a chance of forgiveness, because inevitably Matthew knew that that was exactly what would happen if the french man caught up with him. He didn't want to be forgotten any more. He didn't want to be a weak invisible nobody. And why no one understood that was beyond matthew.

Matthew wanted to die. He thought all of Francis's flirtatious innuendoes with him where worth something but apparently not. Everything he did was in vain. Nobody loved him, he never was able to do anything to get peoples attention. He wasn't rowdy and noisy like his brother nor was Canada one to just strike up a conversation with somebody he was a shy soft spoken young man that was just trying to belong. His own bear seemed to forget his name, even though it lived with canada. His heart ached, with many emotions that swirled inside of canada. His other pet peeve was when people mistook him for his brother, that was the worst, they hit him and blamed him for things he never did, his name was un-heard of. Canada was breaking, falling apart, and all he wanted to do was get away.

Before francis knew what had happened his precious was gone and off in to the storm swooped in, probably a mood swing on Alfred's part. He dismissed the storm silently pondering to himself what he had just done, he kissed his enemy, and to make things even shittier, matthew had seen. Francis didn't know why he kissed england, it was a spur of the moment action and although he hated america, he loved to tease him about everything. So maybe he decided, it was to spook a reaction from the American to coax hidden feelings to the surface. After all he was the country of romance, he recognized the unspoken affection between the two earlier then any one else had. Brining his hand up to his chin france stroked his small patch of hair there in thought, it was only just a kiss. What was wrong with it? He flirted with every thing that had two legs, arms, and a lack of common sense. So why now did matthew choose to be this way. As an expert in love himself france himself had to ponder this, and before he knew why he chose to chase matthew even though he knew it would be a mistake, France's legs sprinted into a run as he pushed into the storm.

His instincts pulled him deeper into the storm, he wanted to embrace matthew and whisper sweet sugary words into his ear to make him happy again, but for what? france would most likely start his flirtatious behavior with everything and end up at square one with matthew again. What a poisonous cycle he was on indeed.

"Matthew!" The frenchman shouted in vain his shout absorbed completely by a shock of thunder that rippled through his ears nearly deafening him. He genuinely hopped that matthew was alright. Fear coursed through France's veins, He messed up. And it was only when he spotted a body on the ground that he realized this, his heart plummeting up his throat and back again through his stomach.

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><p>Warm salty tears slipped down England's flushed face. How many times had he dreamt of something like this happening. How many times had he wished for it to happen, the number was to high. Something didn't feel right, deep in his gut england knew something was wrong, he wasn't naive, something was off. It didn't feel like it was america whose lips where pressed against England's. A sharp pain was numbing the back of his mind as small distorted images cycled through England's mind, slowly slipping into a flash back.<p>

"_Thats not fair! I didn't mean to brake the window! it wasn't my fault and you are yelling at me!" Colonial america stomped his feet loudly into the ground, his face red with anger "I hate you england!" The boy stormed off huffing and tousled his hair away from his face " I never want to see you again!" He hissed sharply before slamming his bedroom door in England's face. _

_Never had alfred yelled at him like this before, he was shocked, turmoil deep within himself. He was only going to nicely ask alfred to clean it up and shrug it off like nothing happened. America raised his voice, angering England into a small fit of furry, he didn't mean to yell at alfred. His heart wrenched, unknown emotion to england rushing to the surface. He wasn't sure if he should take Alfred's words seriously. The boy seemed to be thrown into random fits of intense emotion at random times. He was Becoming increasingly worried for alfred. Stress, that was what fueled england now, he needed to unwind. The trip to his colony was a lengthy one and troubles with spain and france where not helping him much. The britain decided he would sleep it off and hope for the best in the morning._

_When england woke, a pair of bright blue eyes seemingly hovered above himself._

"_England! wake up! today we should go shooting before you have to leave! you promised me you would show me how to shoot a musket before you left to europe this time! Pleeeaaase?" The young colony bounced on England's chest, his eyes gleaming in happiness. England squinted, Something defiantly was not right here. The boy was absolutely fuming yesterday, and in the morning he is greeted with childish happiness? Frowning england sat up, his expression dull._

"_I thought you said you hated me?" Muttering mostly to himself england glanced at the child, whose bright orbs where wide in confusion._

"_Why would i say that? i don't hate you england i never could. I love you big brother." The child nuzzled England's shoulder resting his head in the crook of England's neck, softly breathing. "I will never hate you." _

_Those where the last words england heard before his eyes slipped shut and he was thrust roughly from his flash back into reality._

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><p>Gilbert twisted in pain his eyes seemingly melted shut. The ball gag in his mouth was coated with saliva, he ground his upper teeth into the ball, biting back a moan to the best of his abilities. Soft albino flesh rose haphazardly, gilbert desperately trying to keep his impaled chest breathing. This was torture. Even his masochistic side was not enjoying the attention he was currently receiving against his will.<p>

"You going to feel really good soon gilbert. Don't struggle or you will only make things worse for yourself... da?" His voice was chipper and seemingly sweet, oh how poisonous the innocent Russia's voice was: addicting yet scalding.

**A/N: THE PERSON WHO TELLS ME WHAT MENTAL CONDITION ALFRED HAS WINS A PRIZE! XD so how was this chapter? Wow i managed to squeeze alot of stuff in here. But wow i think this is the best one so far :3 YOU ALL GET COOKIES FOR BEING SO LOYAL TO ME :3 Thank me later for writing this it was fun~ review please and tell me how you like this so far~~~**


	5. The ravens touch

**A/N: Oh my thank you so very much to everyone that reviewed! i got many many good words for the fourth chapter especially! Now to answer that little cliff hanger i left you all with, **

**SasuNaruAngel: Thank you so much for all of your kind reviews i really appreciate it! Sadly though... It's not MPD ^^**

**Iggy: Nope! though that is a very good guess :D thank you for the review ^^**

**Naniigirl99: Thank you so much for your reviews ;) Im glad your so eager for my next update!**

**The Beatles Sherlock Holmes Fa: LOL your name is amazing :DD when you brought up oedipus complex that made me re-think Alfred's condition XD I love that concept but sadly you are right that is not his personality disorder ^^**

**toshiro321: Gilbo... Hmm that brings nasty thoughts to my pervy mind hurhurhur He's going to be in for a world of hurt soon ^^ but that's why i love russia /drools**

**Yamino Tenshi 202: OwO you named so many! yet sadly the specific one i am looking for is not there DX Thank you im glad you enjoy this story and i appreciate your very kind review ^^ That's a bit more then a few 8D **

**XionAmmy: Ah~ you made me happy indeed, the fact that you noticed these little details, I have decided that the disorder alfred has is Split Personality disorder. Not MPD alfred ha but only two personalities that he switches from! The reason why alfred is so rocky with his mood swings is because he's struggling inside, inner turmoil that i will be exploring in the next few chapters ^^ Anyway as for something that you win... You get a cookie :DD either that or i can write you a one shot for any couple, or a poem ^^ it's your choice, Original there was someone that mentioned this before you but that person was anonymous and therefore it would be just a bit hard to track that person down XDD**

**OK IM SORRY GUYS IM DONE RANTING, this chapter is going to be UsUk only ^^ the side couples will be in the next chapter ^^**

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><p><strong>Summary: <strong>His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly: "America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the fourth of July.

**Warnings: I do not own hetalia or its characters and if i did there would be soooo much more yaoi in the series XD I do however own the poem in this story i wrote it myself :) its called the ravens touch!**

**Beginning song: Save you by Emilie Autumn **

**Ending song: Lullaby by Creed**

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><p><strong>oOo Life Drops oOo<strong>

As england came back to, he realized the strong warmth of soft yet firm lips still pressed to his own petal soft lips, Their tongues tangled together in a flurry of passion, teeth clicked together as hands explored the body. A soft moan was pulled to the surface, No this wasn't supposed to be happening, the american should not be pressed so close to him. Shouldn't be kissing him like this, Yet it felt right in ways that england couldn't even explain, small tears rolled down his cheeks. Emotions swelled in the Brit's chest, This wasn't america he didn't want things to be this way. It was hard to explain but this just wasn't america, the america he was seeing now reminded him of the colonial brat he has or thought he had raised so well.

"A-america stop it... Bloody stop it!" Struggling England tried as best he could to pull away not only from the America's raw strength, But also from the warmth and heat of Alfred's body. After all it had been so many decades that he had been longing and lusting after the American's body, and mind. To think that one kiss was able to stir the brit up this much boggled his mind. Reaching up to grab Alfred's hair, Arthur roughly pulled his former colonies head back trying to pry himself free. Twisting in slight pain America's expression was scalding, burnt England's memory, The look of pure hatred and what almost seemed to be disgust painted the surface of America's face. Yet still he said nothing, but obliged and pulled away completely.

"Will you listen to what i have to say then?" He ground out through clenched teeth, Bright blue orbs shinning with a heat that could only be marred into ones mind as seething hate, yet passionate in a seemingly twisted sort of way, England mused.

"I've killed many people in the wars, yet i don't think i have ever known anything that has filled me with as much pain as you have. I hate expressing my emotions yet for some reason you find it easy to just throw your emotions out on the table, so that people can eat away and pick at the pain you feel", Shrugging his shoulders america began again, "I hate that about you. Did you know that england?" He asked curtly, eyes narrowing slightly.

Mouth gapping open england felt like a fish with his mouth flopping around yet no words where formed. Why was his former colony being so... curt he hated it! HATED IT! he was the one who was supposed to talk like this not the bright blond kid he had raised, someone who was so chipper. Two could play at this game.

"Th-there are things about you i hate as well you know..." England began his voice shaking slightly his hands shaking at his sides, why was he turned into such a irrational pile of glop?

"Sing along mocking bird you don't affect me..." America responded rather quickly and in a rather husky tone of voice. "You know i wrote poetry?" He asked quietly, "I'll re sight one for you." America's gaze turned almost animalistic as his voice softly yet chantingly re sighted his poem.

"Thou skin while creamy,

it be cold as ice, resting

rotting in the flaming underworld

swallowed so completely whole by the

ravenous sorrow of the endless

void.

While thou art crossing the

boat shrouded in death, as

it stares you in the eyes,

swallowing your purity

for all of heavens worth.

Thou skin art tainted with

the clammy depths of waters,

that cascade below thine

death bed. Thou annoying,

irritating heart pounding,

coursing through every fiber of my

being and every vein i posses.

Seeping deep within the heart

manifesting and dissolving

sweet soft meaningless tissue. The

stars your eyes hold slowly

dim away, as a cold metal knife

plunges into your gut, bleeding

profusely from the scares you hold.

And the raves of death approach as

i lay silent in my room, ignorant to

the weeping souls that glisten hotly round.

Thou cries of pain fuel my

hazy mind, a the pangs of the

silver weapon penetrate my skin,

ripping and tearing apart the

flesh of rosy color, and

warm touch.

My skin while creamy,

be cold as ice, resting...

rotting..."

As america finished reciting the poem england stood there small tears rolling down his cheeks both countries jumped as the sound of thumping rolled through the room. Both countries glanced at the window watching as a raven hit the window and fluttered off leaving its dark feathers behind on the ground. Blinking america glanced around the room noticing that the lights where off he blinked again.

"Dude why are you shaking? And why are the lights off?" That annoying american accent filled England's ears and he fell to his knees shaking violently as he tried to contain his sobs.

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><p><strong>AN: The inspiration for that poem was from along time ago but i remember this girl and she just completely changed my life, so i originally wrote this poem for her it just happened to work well in this story. WHOEVER TELLS ME WHAT MUSIC HINT I PUT IN THIS CHAPTER WINS A PRIZE XD Well thats it for this chapter thank you all for reading this! Reviews are deeply appreciated ^^**


	6. Drips of Insanity

**A/N: Oh dear god i am so sorry everyone i am terrible. HORRIBLE. I have been in-active for sooooo long and holy shit this is not ok! I need to get my lazy ass writing again! Oh god if any of you are still here, THANK YOU LMAO! Wow. Oh yes i have decided to change the story title because i think that Life drops is more fitting. This story used to be called Fireworks.**

**SasuNaruAngel: Holly crappy LMAO yes that is it. It's the line sing along mocking bird, It's the song coming undone by Korn.**

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><p><strong>Summary: <strong>His cheeks flushed bright as his hands feverishly pumped the toy into himself. Tears welled in his eyes as his embarrassed voice moaned loudly: "America..." He cursed the multi-colored fireworks that could be seen from across the sea, because after all, today was the fourth of July.

**Warnings: I do not own hetalia or its characters and if i did there would be soooo much more yaoi in the series XD All mistakes are my own. **

**Song: Running after my fate by John Pierre Taieb**

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><p><strong>oOo Life Drops oOo<strong>

America stood there utterly dumbfounded, Bright ocean blue orbs wide open. His mood had declined significantly, from irritated to 'what the hell England is crying' in about 5 seconds flat. And indeed England was sobbing on his knees, hands buried in his face, cheeks red, hair askew. America couldn't recall anything that had happened in the last 10 or so minutes, his memory hazy with a fog laced in confusion. Had he said something to upset the other man? The last thing America remembered was leading England up into his room, and glancing upon the pictures lining the stair case walls. They always without fail filled America with a deep guilt, his stomach would twist into knots, making him sick. The younger country searched his memory the best he could but to no avail, Mind swirling with possibilities until it settled on a rather disturbing thought. Immediately he choked down that thought, No he would never hurt England physically, or mentally for that matter.

But at that last thought America wasn't so sure if the mental part was entirely true. Something was eating at his core...

The room was dark and the rain was still ebbing on outside, the only sounds present in the room was England's sobs and the subtle patter of rain, whispering through the night. Something wasn't right, something was very wrong. Deep in America's belly he felt a resounding unease grip his innards and squeeze, unrelenting and brutal. Oh he was beyond sick at this point, sharp pangs played his heart for everything it was worth, working and melding his heart into a rather panicked state.

"E-England what's happening?" America found himself out of breathe just by speaking a simple sentence, he felt as if he had run a marathon race. Blue orbs searched through emerald green eyes, filled with tears.

"B-bloody hell A-America what is wrong with you!" England twisted the bottom of his shirt in frustration, the anger bubbling and pooling in his very core. "I said stop! If I say stop, you bloody stop wanker! Your twisted and there is something wrong with you! Even when you where a child I noticed screws that where a bit loose!" The brit was shaking now, shaking from the sobs that poured from his mouth, and shaking from the anger that gripped his throat tight.

"I-I... I don't... England..." America's eyes where deep with desperation, "England I don't know what... I can't-" But before America could even finish his sentence the Brit had stood up, punching America square in the jaw with every once of strength he possessed. A sickening crack filled the air, England felt bone break beneath his hand, his eyes where wide in terror and shock, giving him a rather maniacal and feral look. Anguished screams filled the air, America's lungs burned with the need to breathe, his choked breathes quickening. His throat was raw from the sheer force of the scream. America screamed his throat raw, face turned downwards. Eyes screwed shut in a pain he hadn't experienced since the time his capitol was burned down, marring his own skin with deep burns. Such was the consequence of being a country.

England's ears rang, deafened for a moment, his eyes still trained on America. The Englishmen's knuckles where bleeding rather profusely, rivulets of blood dropping onto the dull grey carpet below. Oh god, oh god things where going so wrong. So so so very wrong. England ran. He ran and ran till he was out of America's house. He ran through the rain, yearning for the security blanket of British soil, anything that he could call his home.

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><p><strong>AN: I am very cruel i know. I apologize for taking so much time to put out this chapter... I hope that this will stave you off until next time (Which will come much sooner i assure you) Like i have said before this story goes into very dark places. And don't worry America's injury will not be an obstacle. Flames will be used for campfires. Oh and i know that i said that the side couples will be in this chapter but i lied :P there will be an entire chapter dedicated to them.**

**Did you like this? Was it ok? Let me know please, just getting back into this groove and i want to please you all :) **


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